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TAC122 37, Female, Washington, USA - 1,868 views

21

Feb 2007
10:49 PM EDT

today my mom told me that she might have cancer in her overies. This scares the shit out of me. i dont know what i will do if she has it and if she dies. i hope that when they do sugery its just a growth. I already had a shaky faith and wasnt sure if there even is a god. But this, if she has cancer then i think that god doesnt excist. my mom is so unselfish. she would do anything for me and my family. she deserves the best. i love her so much. she has so much faith in everything she has this journal and today i read some of the things and she writes to god and the last thing she wrote was that she is praying for me and my sisters future husbands and that i got thanksgiving off from work and she is so amazing just the little things like that i just cant believe that she would pray for. if i lost my mom i dont know what i would do. who would i talk to about everything that happend at school? or my problems w/ my boyfriend. or watch scary movies w/. my mom is so beautiful to me i love her.

1 comment(s) - 08:11 PM - 03/01/2007

sweets 53, Female, New York, USA - 1,483 views

09

Mar 2007
4:57 AM EDT

THANK YOU JESUS FOR ANOTHER DAY.

BrokenHeartBecauseOfHaircut9494 35, Male, Kansas, USA - 1,318 views

26

Feb 2007
1:46 PM EDT

How can I find the rest of my heart? I lost it with another guy and know I can't seem to find it!

brokenheart 31, Female, Montana, USA - 1,525 views

22

Feb 2007
9:21 PM EDT

Okay I can make anyone smile and i love to be out with my friends and my "guy" friends! I geuss that I have a great life Oh My who I am trying to fool I hate mylife my boyfriend bet the crap out of me and i dont know what to do and i love him and dont want to get him in troubel or anything and i told one of my friends and boy did she want to kill him but yeah oh and i am in love with an really hot guy but i dont think it will ever happen i am just to hidious and even my boyfriend agrees with me that i am ugly so yeah and i think that i should just die its not like anyone would care i get hated for being bi i am bi get over it! All my friends dont know what to do with me anymore i am just in hell right now and my life suxs! I wish that i could find just one friend that just could be there for me no matter what i do or what happens i just hate mylife i fell inlove and then i ancedendly told them that i was in love with them and so now i dont know what to do with myself i want to die and no i do not have depression its just the truth i think that life is just hell at this time in any girls life! so yeah my life is just hell in every way and i dont want to feel like this i want to be happy but i am just not i am just sad all the time well except when I am with him! (lyle) he brings all the light i have ever needed to my life if i am cryin he could make me laugh and just smile forever but he isnt around much so when he is gone my life is hell but when he walks in i just begin to shine like i never have before and then there is chrisco the worlds greatest guy in the whole world he never leaves my heart i love him soooooooooo much all i do is think about him night and day and i dont know what to do i have no clue about anything anymore I just forgot how to do anything i just dont want to make a big mistake because i want to do things with him that i dont know if i am ready for but i also dont know if he is ready eather i dont want ot rush him because i dont want to be a slut or anything but i think that everyone already thinks that I am i dont want to lie any more i dont want to hurt anymore but i geuss i will forever!

1 comment(s) - 10:18 AM - 02/23/2007

sloppysqueen08 34, Female, California, USA - 3,200 views

03

Mar 2007
4:22 PM PST

well diary im soo sorry for not writin you for the past couple days, well guess what happened me and joe broke up on the 27th! or the 28th! i dono but yup he broke up with me!, i knew sumthing was wrong i mean ever since the day of kinos birthday when he stopped talkin to me out of no where, somethin was up and yup he broke up with me for nothing i actually didnt do nothing!, he was talkin about everything being real stressfull and he dont wanna be doing this and stuff but Im like whatevers right now! sooo i guess we do jus need a stupid break, thats what he wanted in the first place, and then friday he called me tellin me he wanted me back, but i said no, im tired of him doing this to me! he just dont understand, Im not ganna hook up with no one or nothing like that i mean hes all i need, but all ima be doin is tryin to spend time with my friends if whenever i can, ive jus been talkin to as many people i could find to talk to. To keep my mind off of him, its hard but im doing okay...so yup ima go out tomarow i wana go dancing at THE GRAD hopefully it all goes good...and i geta dance with whoever i want to, but if i do dance with any guys probably not though, its just ganna be dancing and nothing more, Im not tryin to hook up with no one! unlike rosie, i cant believe she already went out on a date, but i think it changes one your love of your life cheats on You I hope it never comes down to that with me and joe I dono what i would do!...i mean i think that, that would be the end of us if it ever came down to it....I hope it never happens! well i love joe but it hurts how he treats me i should have put an end to it from the begining but i didnt cuz i love him and i do want to be with him for the rest of my life i just want him to change his ways then our life would be just great how i know it will be.... well till next time LATERZ,

<3 JennY G. <-----hahaha G for guerrero!

HoneyBunny 41, Female, Texas, USA - 2,196 views

28

Feb 2007
9:37 AM CST

What do I expect of others?

I expect of others what they expect from me. to be a good and honest person and to have repect for eachother.

bigtroubles5 64, Female, New Mexico, USA - 1,598 views

22

Feb 2007
8:16 PM MST

the middle

3:09 am

I have been awakened again because he has been up with the new puppy for two hours and now he needs his sleep. I went to bed at 12:15am myself, I look across the bed and the clock says 2:08. WOW what a contribution. Thats OK, he has told me he needs his rest for an important meeting tommorrow,his day off.Everything about him is more important than me. His religion, his demands, his expectations, his sleep. It is the end of Feb and I have not had the pleasure of sleeping through the night since OCT 10.

Saw the doctor again today, expressed my fear of the rap[id weight gain....23 lbs in 2 months. She confirms that if I don't sleep I can't keep weight off. I tried to share my fear with him...he gaffawed imediately then wondered why I was not talking to him. new pupppy out cold now... three runny bowel movements later..me I am wide awake will this be 1 pound or 2?

Angelbug07 35, Female, Michigan, USA - 2,065 views

03

Mar 2007
4:43 PM EST

Trust? What is trust? Who can you trust? You must be careful in whom you convey your trust in; they just might hurt you in the long run. Everyone needs that one person they can trust and tell things to in confidence.

Well, I have learned this lesson the hard way. THe one person I thought I could convey in, stabbed me in the back.I was hurt and sadden deeply that they could do that. They were the one person I thought I could trust. I guess what I am trying to say is becareful on whom you tell things too and trust.

charliemay 30, Female, United Kingdom - 15,794 views

12

May 2007
11:36 PM EET

he totally ignored me 2day.he didnt say a word 2 me.at alland i dont know why.i keep thinking how well he goes with all these other girls and not me.and i keep on thinking about me being with otheer boys.i love him and i dont want to break up with him so why am i having these thoughts.i just dont know.

oki 32, Female, Japan - 2,690 views

25

Apr 2007
11:45 AM PST

I don't really define love. Love can't be defined. You're a fool to try it. Love cannot take a form---it cannot be defined. Do you mean, what it means to me? WEll I'll tell you--love is my hate, and that hate is love. It gets on my nerves. Its like a bug that flies around, annoying people. Love comes and goes. Nothing lasts forever. My grandparents; my great grandparents; and my parents have all divorced. Isnt that hinting something?

1 comment(s) - 07:33 PM - 01/22/2009

mOmmy2Be 35, Female, Texas, USA - 12,097 views

03

Mar 2007
10:39 PM CDT

A True Best Friend

I don't think you know her,

She's not very popular.

She's the most beautiful person I know,

And she always makes me feel great.

She knows how to brighten my day,

Even if it's the darkest one yet.

She always has my back,

No matter what.

She's a True Best Friend.

She has a heart of gold.

She has hair of dark brown.

She's my angel.

She's my soon-to-be childs' God Mother.

She's the only one who understands me 24/7.

We've been through thick and thin,

Ups and downs,

Boys and more boys,

And even stupid girls.

We've been through hard times,

And we've been through good times.

We enjoy each other's company.

No matter what time of day.

She's the first person I talk to in the morning.

And the last person I talk to when I go to sleep.

She'a a True Best Friend.

She has her fault's,

But, then again, who in this world doesn't?

She sees every tear.

She catches the next,

And she stops the third.

She is there and already knows what's going on before anyone else.

She's the type of person that you can give your life to,

And not expect her to hide it,

or give it back.

She's always here for me,

Whenever I need her.

She drops everything for me,

And she'll use her last drop of gas to come get me,

And not expect nothing in return.

She's A True Best Friend.

Her name is Elisha Lynn and she's the most amazing person I know. Girl, you're my angel and I love you so, so much.

Much Love from me and the baby...

Best Friends Forever and Always

May 2006 - 'til the day we die!

LB*13 31, Female, Texas, USA - 16,224 views

27

Jun 2007
6:40 PM EDT

How do you decide something that will change your life forever??

If you have any advice please tell me....

Thanks

5 comment(s) - 09:30 PM - 07/16/2007

jezebel 44, Male, Texas, USA - 2,386 views

28

Feb 2007
7:14 AM EDT

Letters to Mr. Brown

What do I expect of others? Well, apparently a lot more than others are willing to give me. I expect for people tohonor their words. I expect for people to be honest with me. I expect to be able to trust people that I care about. But I guess that's just too much to ask. I guess what I expect and what I deserve are too very different things. Apparently I am not worthy of the things that I expect from others.

martha1028 63, Female, California, USA - 1,399 views

25

Feb 2007
11:39 AM PST

ChimokoYamiUmi 33, Female, Oklahoma, USA - 6,964 views

12

Mar 2007
9:35 AM CST

That is true does really mean that.... Well that means alot to hear that because it is very, very true.

jelly3 49, Female, Nevada, USA - 1,607 views

25

Feb 2007
8:43 PM EDT

today really sucked becuase my favorite sista ever is dissing me well she has been dissing me ever since my mom told her that she had to drive me to school when she gets her driver license. so like i have beenignoring her nd my lil sis it was waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay better without them here bcuz my mom actually pays attention to me nd no one treats me like how she treats me nd i really hate to be treated like that she has no idea who i am she thinks im a smoker nd a drugee but imnot i will never become nd never will be those things.i really hate this.GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.i wish i knew wut to do can u plz help me

rinrin 38, Female, Philippines - 1,634 views

26

Feb 2007
6:58 AM EDT

This journal is asking me howI define love for my first entry... how f6767ng fantastic! ...

How do I define love?

The only love that is not making me suffer is love for my family. The others?...

Love is sad. It's making me into an angryperson. It made me doubt. It made me disgusted of my afflictions. It made me so much aware of my weaknesses. I am lost.

This is not love. Love is supposed to make you happy. To make your afflictions nothing. To loose all your doubts. Love is supposed to be strength. I am falling apart. This is not love. It didn't resemble one at all...

cello1975 49, Female, New York, USA - 1,538 views

22

Apr 2007
5:33 PM EST

I know its not good...and I said I wasnt going to drink anymore.. But..

Everything with the wedding is stressing me out. My hair is falling out.. My Father is showing his selfish, baby pain in the ass side again..I have a million people to pay BEFORE the wedding and I still have my monthly bills to pay.

Lets not forget.. the beautiful amber glow of the check engine light in my car! haha...Sometimes ya gotta laugh I guess.

Things could ALWAYS be worse!

I'm sure there are people all over the world wishing they had it as bad as I do right know

I'm completely aware of that.. I'm just venting.. Venting online so that I don't say something I'll regret to folks I actually have to interact with daily.

I'm off to have a few of those little bottles of white zinfandel that are left over from my sisters wedding!

Nitey

babygurl12 32, Female, Tennessee, USA - 8,430 views

24

May 2020
2:19 AM

The Big G

Gratitude has been a hugeeee part of my existence and I noticed as I looked back on my old journal entries that gratitude was lacking a lot around me . I was always upset about it and was just puzzled as to why people never showed gratitude for what they had instead of what they didn’t?

manindra 49, Male, India - 18,173 views

01

Aug 2007
8:13 AM I

public

Tags: public

2 comment(s) - 05:45 PM - 11/05/2007

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