Okay I can make anyone smile and i love to be out with my friends and my "guy" friends! I geuss that I have a great life Oh My who I am trying to fool I hate mylife my boyfriend bet the crap out of me and i dont know what to do and i love him and dont want to get him in troubel or anything and i told one of my friends and boy did she want to kill him but yeah oh and i am in love with an really hot guy but i dont think it will ever happen i am just to hidious and even my boyfriend agrees with me that i am ugly so yeah and i think that i should just die its not like anyone would care i get hated for being bi i am bi get over it! All my friends dont know what to do with me anymore i am just in hell right now and my life suxs! I wish that i could find just one friend that just could be there for me no matter what i do or what happens i just hate mylife i fell inlove and then i ancedendly told them that i was in love with them and so now i dont know what to do with myself i want to die and no i do not have depression its just the truth i think that life is just hell at this time in any girls life! so yeah my life is just hell in every way and i dont want to feel like this i want to be happy but i am just not i am just sad all the time well except when I am with him! (lyle) he brings all the light i have ever needed to my life if i am cryin he could make me laugh and just smile forever but he isnt around much so when he is gone my life is hell but when he walks in i just begin to shine like i never have before and then there is chrisco the worlds greatest guy in the whole world he never leaves my heart i love him soooooooooo much all i do is think about him night and day and i dont know what to do i have no clue about anything anymore I just forgot how to do anything i just dont want to make a big mistake because i want to do things with him that i dont know if i am ready for but i also dont know if he is ready eather i dont want ot rush him because i dont want to be a slut or anything but i think that everyone already thinks that I am i dont want to lie any more i dont want to hurt anymore but i geuss i will forever!