I felt the surge of static all over my body. The feeling stayed for a while, numbing my senses. Then I felt very light. Suddenly all colors became a myriad of emotions. Everything abound me seemed to become as beautiful as rainbow. I felt myself drifting away. Away from what? I wanted to ask. But I was more overwhelmed by the beauty.
I saw my body lying on the familiar bed, facing opposite my wife. The face was never a face of contentment. Poor me. Always dreaming for joy I could never find but could never find it. Always hoping for the blissful peace of mind that seemed so elusive in this world.
But what is this? Is this still the world I know? I felt drifting away from it every minute. The sensation was different. The feeling was so strange, yet so pleasing. It was the most delightful feeling I ever had since I started knowing life. It was beyond life. It was beyond reality.
Reality drifted away from me. I found myself in a state of nothing, completely aware of peace, peace I've never had. It was a peace that made me smile. It was a peace I have always longed for.
Then the feeling of loneliness started building up inside me, like a thorn in my heart that I wanted to ease but I could not. I looked around and searched for other beings like me, but I could not find anyone. I was alone in that void. There was none to be with. What is the purpose of existing in any state if I would be alone? What is the use of beauty if you could not share it?
I discovered a new truth. After finding the peace of mind almost everyone is searching for, you would eventually turn to find someone to share it with.
In real life, that peace is impossible.
Even if it could be possible, sharing it would be a disaster.
Peace is destroyed the moment you share peace with another.
Pity.
I did not notice the tear drop falling from my eye.
You're not alone...
I heared the voice from my mind more than from my ear. It was the most beautiful female voice I have ever heard. I turned around and saw her. No, I did not saw her. My five senses seemed to be gone. I am now sensing with my heart. I am seeing, hearing, feeling, smelling, and tasting with my heart. Or is it really my heart?
Who are you? I asked her. I could not make up better words though I wanted to. The words came off like instinct, coming from within instead of from the lips.
I am she, she told me.
The feeling of joy on meeting her was already inexplicable. It felt as if our souls are bridged immediately by the nothingness surrounding us. It was as if I was a cotyledon of a seed and she was the other half. She seemed to be my perfect match, seeing through emotions, feeling through the heart.
Thank you for being here, I said. I felt her happiness. I felt her smile. I could feel through her. I could see what she saw. And I could feel her sense of fulfilment on meeting me.
It is I who must thank you, she replied.
Her heart met mine, as if we're drawn to a tight embrace but the sensation was more than that. I felt her heart expressing happiness, contentment, peace, and love. Somehow I feel the same way, and I knew she felt through me.
My soul skipped with joy. It felt like heaven.
I have been looking for you, she told me.
I know, I answered. Me too...
Yes ppl it's that time of year again, that's right Valentine's day is fast approaching and anyone who knows me knows that this time of year depresses the crap out of me so i have written another poem about it
AGAIN A YEAR?
You owe me nothing
Not even a tear
It's Valentine's Day
Yes it's been a year
I'm dead and hollow
sitting here
Limp and numb
As seasons pass
Yet still you blink,
not one lash.
Summers gone
And winter's passed
So in my wrist
I carve a gash
At first it trickles
Till at last,
My vein's run cold
And life has passed
In death there's warmth
And summers last
Again we're friends
Just like our past
And again my friend
I learn to laugh
But that was then
and this is now
So I stop to wonder about how
How it came to this
Is this the end?
But still I have one question then
My Question is;
HOW DID IT COME TO THIS?????
ok, so there's this guy i've liked for about four or five years. and i can hardly speak when i try to talk to him! and when i'm around him i always try to act out or make him notice me. he talks to me and he's REALLY nice. but i just get so nervous!!! i just want to act cool and calm. but i am just so scared he'll laugh in my face. oh, and he's like, 3 years olderer than me, but i read that it doesn't matter if he's under 4 years older than you.
has anyone else gone through this type of thing? if you have could u plz give me advice. it would REALLY help! thnx so much!
i am acually jelous of my best friend Kayla's realashinship because she has a guy who truely cares..and no guy at my schools like me like that.. I feel horible..ibut i could get a guy on here like that *snaps* but i want a guy i kniow uin real other wise he can't hold my hand or kiss me or anything it truely sux! love your favorite emo girl- Kitty
Well there really is not much to say there is alot going on in my life and I dont really know what to do about all of it...I am back to cutting and that sucks... I have had a few slip ups in the last few weeks which is not good.. But its okay..Me and kris are doing okay.. and all of viv's puppies are growing up to be beautiful! I love my vivvy... and now we have star trigger anna bell bear and trey... all of which I will have to sell soon... but I think that scott is going to get to keep trey... He is really excited especially with me and kris moving out soon!!! I HOPE,,,, Mom kicked us out agian but as normal she was all Im sorry by the end of the day... I love my kris kris but we are fighting alot lately.. I dont really know what to do about all that.. I have tried talking to he that doesnt really help any..just makes her mad that seems to be what I am good at... I really dont know what to do anymore... But it is okay we will work through it like we work through everything,, I know we will.... I am starting to talk even if it will make her mad.... i am at the point that if I have something that I want to say I am going to say it... I really am getting better... i dont really know what to rant anything else about so I guess Im gonna go ahead and get off of here...atleast everyone knows i am kinda sorta alive... LOVE YALL....