view member journals

������ I am so fuckin tired of not having money. First we don't have enough to pay for the house, which I have come to terms with and accepted that we're gonna have to move. Now we have to cancel everything cause my mom broke her foot and her doctor is charging the maximum permited by law. So pretty much everytime she goes to the doctor (once every two weeks) she has to pay $200 plus the cost of x-rays. So it may sound selfish but I'm mostly upset about loosing my cell phone. And I'll explain that. I'm in cyber school so I don't get to see people every day and she wants to turn the home phone off too. The only reason we have internet is because I'm in cyber school and they pay for it. On top of that I can't go on most public sites because they are blocked. So it's not like I could talk to my friends on Myspace or somethin like that and my mom has yelled at my best friend enough that she won't just stop over here and I don't feel right just stopping over there because not only is that weird and kinda stalkerish but they're not there most of the time. She normally goes to school, goes home changes, goes to work, and then goes home and goes to bed. So for us to hang out there has to be communication and that can't happen if I don't have a phone. But my mom said that she's gonna keep my phone. She has her own phone but she said shes just gonna keep mine. You know I knew that I wouldn't have friends for long but I just wish the deciding factor wasn't money. Whatever it's over.

i will read book at 07:00am-18:30pm

i�making�will� good teat for tmr "22 Sep 09"

But i have�mum�and dad�live to� me everyday

and everytime

i will not give they�sad

Bcez i love them very much

Buy have a good dream

�

I can't seem to figure out how to sign back into here but�I have realized that inbox journal gives me a way to update without having to sign in.� For some reason the password I use for everything is not working.

I don't think I'll be using this any more for that reason.

It's such a perfect day that i dont want to stay at home :) But it's too late (:

So I'm not really good at keeping journals. Ever. But you know what people say. Writing things down can help you figure yourself out. So here I am, writing my first entry on probably one of the billionth online journal sites I've found. See, I'd keep a physical journal. Like a note book or something.�Except I happen to be a pretty messy person. So I'd lose it in about 3 or 4 hours. That's only a guesstimate though. So I doubt that anybody's actually reading this, but if you are, I suppose I should introduce myself...

�Well I'm not going to. So you should probably stop reading now if you were expecting some incredibly fancy summary of my life and who I am. If I already knew who I was, I wouldn't be here writing down rubbish and trying to "discover my real self". I kind of wonder if there's any sophisticated people on this site or if it's just a bunch of depressed people who want to complain�about their life and right dark poetry. I semi�scanned through the user entries and didn't really see anything too inspirational. No offence guys, but you really could vamp up what you're going to put on here. Sorry if I offend anyone, but I wasn't really expecting to have any readers by now.

Right now my sister is blasting some modern rap music that could possibly make my ears bleed while doing some weird dance that shouldn't even be legal. I sort of want to tell her to shut it off but I guess it'll be something else I can hold over her head later. On account that I have my camera taping the whole thing while she reamains completely oblivious. You probably think that everyone in Alaska rides caribou and dresses like Sarah Palin. Well, I wouldn't know. I don't live in Alaska, I just wish I did. I mean, who likes humidity anyways?

I have a whole theory about my future living in Alaska. Everything will be awesome because I'll never have to worry about frivolous things like sweat stains or frizzy hair. Not only that, but the girl to boy ratio in Alaska is like totally out of whack, so I would have no problem ever having a boyfriend. I mean, who needs a bunch of girls running around raining on my parade. I've found that girls tend to be totally annoying and way to complex for me to have anything to do with, and all they do is stab you in the back and then steal your boyfriend. Who wants that?

So I've decided I'm going to try and make this first entry here so long nobody will be able to finish it. That would be completely epic. I have found that lately there is absolutely nothing good in the theaters. Everything is rated R, which of course I can't get in to. They have police outside the doors to every theater, so movie hopping isn't an option. Oh and they require ID, it's totally whack. Anyways, there's no good movies that are PG-13. I don't know if the directors and movie makers realize, but there is a substantial group of people who range from the ages of 13 to 16. They are called "A large majority of most teenagers". I think I could easily say teenagers are one of the most influential groups in Hollywood. I mean, we decide what's what. It's cool to have like 2 or 3 good R movies in theaters, but seriously. The only movie that's not rated R is Shorts, which is rated PG. Which is pretty much like stabbing my eyes.

I mean, I don't know if they think we're completely niave nowadays or something, but we actually know a decent amount about sex and violence. I mean, it's not like we're all innocent little Catholic school girls who have the sex education of a 6 year old or something. And they think we can't watch violence because it'll influence us to like kill people or something. But we can't really get a hold of guns or anything. By allowing adults to watch violence, they're encouraging adults to go out and buy guns and murder their bosses or something. See? It's retarded. They think we're influenced by every little thing we see. If that was so, I'd be an Obama fanatic right now. But despite the medias effort at such I still completely hate the guy. Just because I watch someone kill someone in a movie (that is so clearly edited) doesn't mean I'm going to run out like a barbarian with a kitchen knife and slaughter the first person I see.

If I was influenced by everything I saw, I wouldn't ever have a clear idea of anything. I'd be surfing the web and run across an add telling me to go buy a goat. Then I'd be like "Hey I want a goat". Then I'd see another add that told me I should never buy a goat. Would my mind automatically change and I wouldn't want a goat anymore? I mean, our minds aren't that volatile?�I really don't think so. Otherwise I'd be running around looking like a giant ball of lard and screaming like Eric Cartman. But I'm not, and I'm a total South Park fanatic. So what are the adults getting at? I think they just want to deprive us of any entertainment.�

I mean, I remember when I was like 9 years old. I'd be watching something on TV, and then one of those ads would come on. It'd be like advertising some awesome product that a normal 9 year old would totally want, and then some number would pop up on the screen. And it'd be like call this now and get your (insert product here)! But not if you're not 18!�Then the add would end and you'd be left like "What the fuck?". Wondering how they could seduce you and then take it all away. That's just cruel. Perfect example of how adults just want us to suffer. Mwahahahahahahahhaahaaa...

Honestly this is just getting boring. I will now proceed to copy and paste this long, obnoxious message on several other sites. That's right, I'm a pandemic. You can't stop me. You're probably wondering "Is this the first site?�Or has she posted it on like 6 others before this?"...

No way. There's no way in hell someone actually read all this. Adios.

Why am I even saying bye?

go to school online and need a job in management or accouting entry level for now

�well life gets worse all the time round here and why because pepole gosip and spead lies and in the mean time i have lost my one true friend and miss him so much we used to have a laugh together tell each other our thoughts and problems but other people just said we were having an afair and that he was just sniffing round waiting for his chance .we had been friends for seven years and i realy could tell him any thing i miss my freind so much ,its been about two months since we last spoke and i miss him i have no one else to talk to now and im lonley with out him . i dont know what to do now�