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Hmmm, where should I begin?
It has been officially�fourty-two days�since the break up that nearly killed me a week ago. My wounds are almost healed but not completely, but the tears still continue to crash around me.
People swear up and down that my fragile, broken, heart will heal soon, but I don't believe them. The wounds will leave scars�that will always remain�deep within�me, and the memories will surely be the death of me. Things haven't been the same for days, and so I continue to find myself in my thoughts, thinking about taking my very own life. Everday is a battle for me to not give in to the sin of death.
But, when I truely think about taking my own life, the peace I find in my heart, makes suicide all the more tempting.

�Problems are usually temporary,
and death is permanent.
There is always a brighter side to things,
even when everything seems wrong.
You gotta just look really hard for something
that keeps you going, and stick with it.

You know, It continues to amaze me. I think back to elementary school when all you needed to worry about is if you were going to pack your lunch or buy it.

Now everything seems to be about sex.�I can't go a day in school without hearing about it. I'm just so sick of it.

I�have this friend (We'll call her Ryley) that I�used to be really close with. We are still close, but lately we haven't been. I just found out that she has already had sex. Okay. A)We are freshmen. and�B)She has only been dating him for about two months. She is way in over her head. I just worry about her.

My sixth period class is art. I love art. It's one of my favorite classes. But now, I�dread going there. Everyday I just hate going there. Why? Well, there is a couple that sits at my table. Thay are always talking about when they had sex. Or when they took a shower together. Really? I don't want to hear that.

And honestly. That is personal. You would think that people would want the whole world to know that.

Anyway now everybody knows about Ryley and her boyfriend and she is pissed because she confided that information with one of my best friends�(we'll call her Ashely)�and she told me, and my two other friends. (We'll call them Jasmine and Jacey)

So now there is like this feud thing and I just don't want to get involved.

But anyway my I am completely in love with my boyfriend. (let's call him Lucas.) We have been dating for three months since March 7th. He is my other half. He tells me he wants to spend the rest of�his life with me. And I�know where I�stand on the whole sex thing. I don't want to do it untill I'm married. He is fine with that. but peopl assume things. They assume that we will do stuff or that he is going to pressure me to do things. But see. He's not like that. Even my mom doesn't think he is like that. If she thinks it's fine, then how come my friends can't?

Anyway, I�just want to avoid the whole sex topic period. But I�don't want to be a bitch when they start talking about it. how can I�just avoid it? Please help me. I'm just a teenage girl who is sick of it.

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Ok well my name is Caitlin and I'm in the 7th grade. I don't have a big sis but a big bro. whos not very helpful. *lol* In grades kindergarden thru 4th grade a guy I am completely in love with was at my school and in my grade, too. His name is Alex. I have always had the same feeling when ever i see Alex. Except its gotten a little bit stronger. I start to shake if i see him or i get really really quiet. I have a "friend", Angel, (who I hate) whos mom sits me. Alex and Angel are like best friends but in fifth grade Alex transford. Sometimes Alex comes over Angel's house but all I can do is look at the floor the WHOLE time because im afraid that i will lock eyes with him and he might think im weird. I don't know if he likes me but everytime i say just one little thing to him then i start to shake like crazy! I want him to know but im too shy and im worried about what he would think, if he likes me and his response. Please help me!

*The Kewlest Dork*