tami2005's Journal

Today was a streesful day today. I just have to focus on that things will not always be this way and that there is always a brighter day. I have not done anything bad today so for that I am proud of myself. I did get mad at someone today for something that they said...it bothered me for a while but like I said I just have to remind myself every day that things will get better. I just have to bite my tongue and focus on the postive and know in my heart that the things that my family is going through will get better and one day we will have our own place and we all will be one happy family....My� focus right now in my life is staying clean although it is a daily fight that I must fight on my own and I will one day overcome this pain and struggle that is inside of me...the next focus in my life is finding a job so that I can help out my family and myself and be able to stand on my own two feet again with out someone being there to help me...I want to know that I can do it all on my own before I have someone special in my life that I have to take care of too....If I can manage these two things then I know my life will once again be what it is suppose to be. I know that I can do it with the help of my loving mom...my loving daddy and all of my loving sisters and that is all I need in life to keep my life on the straight path....I will do this....one day at a time....I just have to keep biting my tongue right now considering this is the only place that my family and I have and I will do that even though it is hard to do at times. I look at my little nephew that is four years old and I wish that I could be that young again because at that age you have nothing to worry about...Adults take care of you but then one day you wake up and you are an adult and that is when you reliaze that life is real and that life is hard....all you can do is hold your head high and look towards the future because as long as you can resist all temptation then you have a future and I just have to keep telling mysef that I do have a future and that I am loved by my family and that is all that I need in my life right now...Good night my dear journal and I will write again tomorrow.