My Book Of Life

Feb 2010
9:32 AM EDT

My father is one of the strongest men I know. I mean he's so hardworking in everything he does, he doesn't earn much money and yet he is always trying to provide so much for us. Now that my mother passed away, i feel as if his role figure became tougher. I feel as if he feels hehas to be both a mother and a father to us. I'm not so close to him, the truth im not so close to any of my family. We all always led diffrent lives and didn't ask what was going on in each other's lives. My daddy is the most important person to me now and I need him more than I ever did. I want him and I to be closer. I want my sister and brother to be closer to me. We need each other soo much yet we are all so distant from each other. I love my family very much, and idk what'd I'd do without them.

I think it's finally hitting me hard. My moms death. I'm scared because, you know when you dont see a person for a long time you start forgetting how they look. You have a clear picuture of them in your head but it slowly starts fading away? That's how i feel. You don't want to forget how they look but you cant provent it. I picture her here, all around the house and what she would be doing. I just wish she'd come back for one whole day. I just wish i could feel her soft hand touch mine telling me she's here with me. It hurts so bad, no one has no idea. If i could give you all a tip, is to appreciate your mom with all you've got. Appreciate her like if todays her last day, love her like theres no tomorrow! I would give anything to have her back.

If only I had a time machine, to go back. I would start my whole life over again with her. I'd give her the world, treat her like royalty, be the best daughter I can be to her! You'll be in my heart forever and ever mommy. I mean it. <33
Reality is a cruel place to be in. </3

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Gender / Age: Female, 29

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