shirleyxu's Journal
21
Feb 2013
9:15 PM CST
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没有硝烟的战争
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青春期孩子的家庭教育犹如一场没有硝烟的战争。当父母们勉强地带着孩子蹑手蹑脚地淌过布满‘各种毒品’的雷区,避过‘性混乱’定时炸弹,在你还没缓过神来时就不幸地被‘网瘾’的迷魂风暴吞噬了,父母们使劲浑身解数结果还是防不胜防,搞不好就被其中之一打中,如果你有幸连中三元就不难搞得遍体鳞伤,尽情地体验失败的辛酸。
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经营上瘾的东西都有市场而且能赚到钱,小到可口可乐,星巴克,网络游戏,大到脸谱(Facebook)和毒品,它们都有一个共同特征,能通过感官或大脑受体给人带来快感。人的IQ和EQ跟抗诱惑能力Q都不太相关。马斯洛的人类需求阶梯理论里头忘记的人类还有对各种快感的不懈追求,这就是为啥如今‘物质鸦片和精神鸦片’都能全球化了呀。
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快感这东西并不都是恶性的,为了抵御不良快感,就得研究良性快感,良性快也上瘾,比如当年雷锋叔叔每次帮助别人后也会获得快感,写完日记就就又获得一次快感所以他做了那么多好事。家长们难就难在如何让孩子们早点找到良性快感比如酷爱一种运动,迷恋一种艺术,喜欢帮助别人,争取在孩子们14岁之前能吃到良性快感的甜头,问题是不良快感容易获得,几次体验就可能上瘾,良性快感的获得不容易,一般要经过几年的诱导期,要把肌肉练发达才能跑第一,谙熟教育的名校都不愿意干这折磨费劲的事,学校只做后期加工,经过严格筛选,他们挑出经过一定打磨的料子,未经打磨的料子太过粗糙不仅加工起来费劲且出废品的风险也大。他们要求孩子不但学习成绩好还要有卓越的课外活动记录,当家长花钱费力花时间地把最难的前期加工做好,学校后期的作业自然就相对容易做了,个个名校都能站着就把钱挣了!
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shirleyxu's Profile
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shirleyxu
Gender / Age:
Female, 53
Location:
China
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SHIRLEYXU's Interests:
About Me:
teaching in medical schools in the past 20 years
Interests:
1)brainstorming with my 9 year old son; 2)sharpenning my husband mind by arguing with him when necessary; 3) loyal funs of Liu Xiang
Favorite Music:
I want to spend my life time loving you
Favorite Movies:
Gone with the wind
Favorite Television:
第一财经,
Favorite Books:
All books by Charles Dickens