Prissy

Was reading up on stressbusters today.

It's pretty interesting the way people learn things. It's even more interesting the way children learn things.

I think I learned to be afraid from my Parents.. more so from my Mom.

I can't hate or blame her for this. It just happened I guess. And since I recognise it now that I'm 29 I can fix it and get on the path to overcoming the fears I've developed over time.

For sure I've always wanted attention. Dad spoiled me (even though we were raised middle-class). He hardly ever said no to anything I asked. He was my hero and my provider.

That little phenomenon somehow turned me into an attention-addict. And I think that's probably why I seek approval from my bosses and peers. I could just be afraid to be normal, cause I didn't grow up normal. I was daddy's little princess. That was the most fantastic experience ever. Except we both enjoyed it so much that we never gave P a chance to metamorphosize into an independent woman.

Mom for some reason became competition in all this. I would turn on her every chance I had. And when they argued I'd save the day by taking sides or running away confused and angry. This was later on in my teens.

So being away from home is an achievement in itself.

Being able to take care of my own self is huge.

But there is more....