angelswatchoverus's Journal

 
    
29
Dec 2006
6:14 AM EDT
   

Lord, have much anger and resentment over my stepson. Help me realize just how imperfect I am, help me realize just how much I disappointed my own father when I was his age and younger. I would take money from my father when I was much older than he and blow it irresponsibly. I would lie and do deplorable things to satisfy my own desires and supress the guilt until the next time. My shame turned to anger and I still to this day drink to numb the pain I have inside. When I see my stepson, I become angry. I feel taken advantage of. I have had my feelings hurt by him so many times. I feel he is rude, disrespectful, greedy, self-centered, and at times hateful. With little or no remorse. Oh how I have emulated in the past these very horrible characteristics...and still do. I pray my heart will change. I pray to Lord that I will stop being a hypocrite. Lord, that when I am angry or upset or overcome with self-centered thoughts, that I would not project that anger to others. Especially my step-son. Jesus, reveal yourself to me today, fill me with goodness from the holy-spirit. Reveal to me the pain in which I caused my father on earth and more importantly, my father in heaven. Lord, help me use this disappointment in a positive way that would glorify your Kingdom. I want to know you, I want you to live inside of me. I want to know your Kingdom. I've made such a mockary of it for years and years. I want to know what it's like to truly be humble. I want to stand before you one day and for you to be proud. I ask you today father to set me free from the bondage I live in. I ask you to set me free from the principalities of this world. I turn all of my thoughts and personal things over to you today and forever. I want to live each day for you going forward. Set me free, oh Lord. Set me free to live in your perpetual peace. I love you Lord, I want to know you. I want to understand the magnitude of your majesty.
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angelswatchoverus's Profile

  • Username: angelswatchoverus
  • Gender / Age: Male, 56
  • Location: USA - Georgia
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