Rosie's Journal

Aug 2016
4:00 PM GMT

New beginnings cont......

So over the last couple of weeks I have been twoing and throwing of what to do. I think I knew deep down what I had to do, but just didn't want to hurt Charlie. He is one of the good guys. So we sat down and decided we would end it. We wouldn't shut each other out either as we both deeply care for one another. That clich� I love you but not in love with you. It really does happen :(�
So that was about a week and a half ago. How am I feeling? Mixed I'm sad that it couldn't work. I generally think if it was later in life it might have. I'm also happy, I'm excited to see what's going to happen in the future! im not in any rush.�
On that note my friends went out at the weekend, we stood in our spot and we danced. Ben the dj was there again. Still staring, still grinning and still giving me butterflies. That excitement feeling of being single, I hadn't had that in ages, I was actually enjoying his attention without the worry of hurting someone else or cheating.�
Nicola and Katie have been great. Constantly listening to me. I suppose that's another reason I started writing on here too. I feel like I'm bombarding them sometimes and I don't want to annoy them. I've been in that situation before your there for your friend but �you sorta want them to shut up sometimes. Anyway they have been fab. Katie decided I needed to pull someone to say that I am totally single! I've haven't had a disco winch in years! I didn't know it's something that people still done! But you know what I thought it made sort of sence a bit of girls fun! �Ÿ˜�
I felt felt awkward though I'm not one to start chatting up folk. I don't know where I plucked the courage from( maybe the shots and vodka had a bit to do with it). So in the club there is 2djs together, they switch about every few hours. Ben was standing there in the dj box while his friend was on decks. Katie egging me on 'go say hi' and that what I did�Ÿ™ˆ I walked up next to him. I was so nervous good nervous though. We chatted, I couldn't even tell you what we talked about! I did tell him I had something important to tell him... Jokingly he said 'your single?' �That was it I was single. Was I turning into one of the girls who he could just click his fingers and go running? It's not the same if it's just for fun is it? We have switched numbers and have been texting for the last few days.�
That excited feeling when you open a text or wait for a reply, or wait to reply because your trying to play cool? I've not had that in so long and I'm enjoying it.�
Apart of me feels bad, am I moving on to quickly? Nicola and Katie have been saying no, as I have been with Charlie but knew it was over but also what's the harm in a bit of attention. I'm going to go with them on that one. Although if I bump into Charlie I think I'll keep it quiet for the time being I don't want to hurt him more than I have too.�

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Rosie's Profile

Username: Rosie

Gender / Age: Female, 34

Location: United Kingdom