lostdog's Journal
13
Jun 2015
7:43 PM CDT
06/13/15
"tired: that word comes to mind a lot. tired of no one being there by my side. feels like theres no friends ou there any more i have use my perpose financialy or emotionaly. All i know how to do is be me i just dont think that is good enough. another one of those times where i take a step back and concintrate on my kids hopeing they have a life that was better than mine.
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13
Jun 2015
8:59 PM CDT
night calling
the night air calls. it has an adicting taste.
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14
Jun 2015
10:12 AM CDT
06/14/15
another bbq again i wonder why i still go.my thought about the hole thing is i'll be wondering if i see one gitl that i cared about that seemed to see easily with out effort to try to hurt me emotionally, and at one point even physicaly hurt me. maybe that was what attracted me to her in the first place. but how can you hurt someon that the only thing there are use to is being hurt. when i think of hurt i still think of my ex. even though i have gotten over her i sometimes like the pain she caused i didnt get over it but i have meerely forgotten it or have just placed it out of my mind. i dont even know if that makes sense. to increase the value of this so called bbq there is another girl i put my self out there for and the only answer you get is she doesnt know what she wants. wich you cant hold against some one i guess, but when to put hope, faith, open up to, and the willing the to take a chance into some one yes no yes no is a hard thing to understand at times.then theres my friend she calls me her bff, i have fun when i am with her. i get a long with her husband, but her boyfriend gets jealous if he heres my name, if i ask her if she wants to get a beer and take her time away from him. i try to not interact with him or even say his name. but yet saome how he seems to have my name is in his mouth. the only thing i ever want is for people to leave me alone. not to mention there will be "friends" that feel have or do forget about me.
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15
Jun 2015
9:22 PM CDT
06/15/15
Well i woke up my back hurt, hip hurt, leg and knee hurt. Went to physycal therepy and still bothered me all day. but in senx still a good day spent it hanging with the kids and not much drama because if it. i like it.
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lostdog's Profile
Username:
lostdog
Gender / Age:
Male, 48
Location:
USA - Illinois
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