jesssie's Journal

Oct 2007
4:31 PM EST

i feel betrayed. and you might not understand it, you might not understand why. but honestly i dont want to talk about it to you anymore. because you dont understand. and i dont want to get angry with you for not understanding, its not your fault. its not mine either though. i try so hard to be there for you alll the time and even when we fight i still give it my all to make sure you're happy! but it feels like you never give anything back. i know you. yyou'll get defensive and say im lying and how its not true and how you care about me and EVERYTHING along those lines yet, you make it so hard for me to believe. yeah, i do give up every time we fight. the friendship seems less and less important to me.and i am not going to change my mind about that. when you're in a bitchy mood, i understand and i tell you im here for you to talk any time when your ready. it just hurts because clearly theres a lack of trust in me, and maybe you have every reason to not trust me.. but whatever. why are we even friends if you dont trust me? i trust you but lately i feel like i shouldnt at all. lately you make me feel like .. i should have given up along time ago? i shouldnt have even started with you. but thanks for the good times, there were more of those than bad. and you taught me a lot, not gonna lie. and you were there for me most times. just not anymore because you have found someone to keep you going. i know, i guess im the old best friend who isnt as important as the new one. im not as important. and if you want to defend that you can, but its not what you say. its how you treat others. and i dont feel like im being treated the way i should.

defend defend defend. you're defensive and when i told you last night i wasnt going to attack you- i didnt. instead, you attacked me. and it didnt end well. you have the most immature way of argueing, and its annoying. and i dont want to have to do it anymore. and thats why this is finally, FINALLY over.

sorry "best friend",
that it never worked out the way it was supposed to.
and i hope you are so much better off without me. well i know you will be. because i treat you like shit, like you said. and just a whole lot of other shit you dont need, thats what i bring to the table. well i apologize for being there for you:$ ill make sure to avoid that in the future?!

byeeeee

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1 comment(s) - 07:29 PM - 10/08/2007

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Username: jesssie

Gender / Age: Female, 32

Location: Canada

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