SterlynSilverRose's Journal

 
    
30
Sep 2006
7:41 PM EDT
   

I'm tired. This is stupid but, this is probably the only thing that will listen without complaining to me and hurting me. My humor on this matter is that watch it crash or not be there tommorrow. I was reccomended to a therapist and I haven't gone yet. But, you know something..I'm not the person that needs a psycotherapist. Why talk to someone that can slam you later for it? You must wonder how I deal with my shit right? I thought I could count on friends but, I have decided that it's a dead end no go. Too many times has it hurt me...So thus my human interaction is totally in shambles. Tony, all the work you did to make me act human again. To realize that I was okay...It's been ripped to pieces. I won't ever let you or anyone get that close again. I've decided that if I want to be alone for the rest of my life. Then by God I am going to do it. Why the fuck should I exert myself...? Why in the hell should I give a damn when no one thinks about me. I know it's selfish but, for once I want someone to be there for me. That's laughable though...So shit, leave me the fuck alone if you just wanna be my friend and you think that it's going to be good if I talk to people about my problems. No more. No one will hear about it anymore. When people ask what is up I will wear a mask and go numb. It's kinda like Pagliacci ...except that I am not a murderous clown. But, he was right...you can take a mask and smile and hide behind it while you cry. That is what I will do from now on. This is on humanities head...Fuck humanity...Fuck social order. Most of all fuck those that think that I am acting out a little over the top.
 Add comment
Add Comment:

Add Tags:
To add multiple tags, please separate them with comma ( , )





SterlynSilverRose's Profile

  • Username: SterlynSilverRose
  • Gender / Age: Female, 36
  • Location: USA - Texas
    •  
     
     
    STERLYNSILVERROSE's Interests:

    About Me: I'm an angsty teen. Haha well I am an adult at the age of 18 and I forget that sometimes. I live in Kerrville Texas on Schriener University campus. I'm an English/Music major...Leaning towards my English at the moment so I can write.

    Interests: Violin Viola Internet Gaming (Rpg games mostly) Writing Drawing (learning) Japanese Speaking and writing

    Favorite Music: Anything is good as long as it isn't heavy gospal music.

    Favorite Movies: Battle Royal and Fudoh...Yes, I am a foreign film buff ...especially Japanese foreign films.

    Favorite Television: Nothing really. I don't watch television.

    Favorite Books: Manga...Over 96 in my collection. Haha so I am doing quite well with it. Also I like any type of dark series I can find.