today is like any other day here, its cold and Iam expieriencing S.A.D. right now. I have to escape this place, need a change of scenery fo real. Talk to my mother and she got it rite this time , about sabatoge. This how I operated in the not so distance past any time I felt like I could fall in love or my feeling were getting deep I would cut off a relationship with someone. Not a good habit, so Iam trying very concertedly to� change this. It is quiet around here, kids are at school despite our weather being in the single digits. My sister was/is supposed 2 show up and help me do some domestic stuff. Appears she is a no show, then again I should not be suprised.
Trying to keep my mind off of "him", attempted to write a poem but cant find it. Thought I saved it in my email as a draft its not there. Have to start from memory all over again. Going 2 take a power nap I need it.
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