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You as a parent always want the best for your children. Your home should be a retreat from the rest of the world. Many parents adopt a sarcastic type of tone in the home and it can toughen up your kids and be strong or it can make them sarcastic and cynical. You need to make your home the safest place for your kids, especially when they are teenagers. In their teen years, kids are in a very negative place mentally. Here are a few things that you can do to make it a little better.
Make home a calm place
There are a few simple and powerful things that you can do right off the bat to start making a little difference. Things like having more natural light, eating dinner together and even having calming essential oils�calming essential oils. A good step is that you need to make your home a calming environment. There is a lot that goes into achieving this that are sometimes easier said than done. Try your best to eliminate shouting and angry words in the home. If there is anger and disputes in the home between the parents, that will trickle down to the rest of the family, so get your relationship in order first. If you have built a habit in the past where the home is not necessarily a safe place, identify what the “dangers” are and have honest conversations about how to change that.�
Choose to Lose Some Battles
Another natural part of growing up is challenging authority. They are not challenging your authority because they dislike you or that they don’t think you love them but because they are wired to�seek for independence. They are looking to discover their identity and attain some independence. There is a balance that you need to manage as a parent. It is important to not let your teenager run rampant, but it is crucial that they gain some independence so that they can actually grow up. They will probably begin to challenge you on most everything, that is totally normal. When they do think to yourself “is this something that if I let them win, the repercussions would be insignificant.” If the answer is yes, consider letting go of the argument and giving them that independence. Still be careful to say “no” when it is what is wisest for them. But consider letting them have their independence on the things that don’t matter a whole ton. Be aware that if you start giving some slack on some issues, they will try and take as much as they can. Just know where the line is for you and when they have pushed too far you can give correction. Just know that being giving that freedom and correction will allow them to feel matured and have a healthy sense of self.
Repeat and do-over with age
It is a natural part of growing is questioning your previous situation and the leadership related to that. If it seems like all of a sudden, your child doesn’t trust you anymore when they used to, it is not your fault but just part of the growing up process. The fact is that you may need to re-earn their trust again. You are not alone in this struggle. All parents encounter this at some point. Show them that you are willing to listen to them and be involved in the things they are passionate about. They may not want to talk very much but the fact that you keep showing that you are interested will make an impact on their mind and behavior. They will expect you to react negatively to just about everything, but when you can surprise them and be reasonable, they will begin to trust you again.
It can be a delicate balance in raising teenagers and even younger children, but it is something that you will be able to accomplish. Make sure in all that you do to let them know that you love and care about them. Don’t even joke about harming them, leaving them, or not loving them. If you don’t mean it then don’t say it in any context.
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