Cloudberry's Journal

Jul 2007
7:52 AM CDT

I really don't know what's going on with everyone. I called HIM on tuesday, and he hasn't called me back. I have no clue what his problem is, and at this point, I think I'll just try to forget about it unless I hear from him. Also, it's my "best friend"'s birthday today, and apparently there's a party I wasn't invited to.

But I'm leaving for workcamp in a few days, which I'm very happy about. Maybe it will help me take my mind off some things? I hope so. My birthday's only five days away!! While I'm sure my parents aren't so happy about me spending by birthday away from home again, I think it's kind of exciting. There are few things I love as much as traveling, so I can't think of any better way to spend my 16th birthday. Then, a couple of days after I get back I'll get my liscence!! That I'm SUPER excited for.

Well, I don't know if I'll write any more before I leave, but I'll probably have some stories when I get back.

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Jun 2007
9:05 AM CDT

It's been a while, so I'll give a VERY brief update. I broke up with my boyfriend, he's sad, I'm not. This other guy kissed me, I'm incredibly happy. However, here's the deal.

The whole reason I got to know this other guy was because we were in this show together, and Sunday was closing night. So now I actually have to make an effort to see him, and that scares me because I don't really know what he's thinking. I mean, he's a BIG flirt, so for all I know he hasn't thought about me once since Sunday, and he doesn't really care if he ever sees me again. I don't want to seem crazy and desperate; but I want to talk to him. I think I'll call him in another day or two when I'm not busy.

Anywho, things are pretty boring now that the play's over. Maybe I'll have more time to write in this thing, and maybe people will actually start reading it. That would be nice.

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Jun 2007
7:04 AM CDT

So I definitely like this other guy.

And my boyfriend is still annoying me. And he's starting to realize that something's changed. I have no idea what to do. This whole thing sucks immensely. I don't know what else to say.

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Jun 2007
4:41 PM CDT

I've got several possible causes I've contributed to my current predicament.

Possible causes:

1. This change in schedule has thrown my emotions out of whack.

2. I've been seeing entirely too much of my boyfriend lately.

3. I'm actually getting tired of my boyfriend.

4. I've hit my boy-crazy streak a little later than most.

5. I'm flabbergasted by the fact that TWO decent guys like me, and I really like being liked.

6. I haven't seen this other guy in a few days, and maybe I'm building him up to be more than he is.

7. I actually like this other guy.

Predicament:

It's probably not too hard to figure out from the preceeding text, but I'll relay to you the short version anyway. So I've had this boyfriend for about 3 1/2 months, and things are going pretty well. But apparently there's just something about me that attracts ALL straight, 17 year old theatre guys, not just my boyfriend. So this other guy is in a show with me and he's cute and he definitely likes me, and I suddenly find myself thinking about him quite a bit more than I think about my other castmates, and maybe even more than I think about my boyfriend. And I've just been kind of annoyed by my boyfriend lately, and he wants to hang out EVERY SINGLE DAY, which I probably would've been ecstatic about a few weeks ago, but now...

I think the real honest reason for my situation is that I tend to fall, to some degree, for every guy that falls for me. I just got out of my awkward phase; I'm not used to guys doing that. I think I'll wait until the show's over and see how I feel.I don't know. Theatre love triangles can be complicated. Any advice would be appreciated.

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Cloudberry's Profile

Username: Cloudberry

Gender / Age: Female, 33

Location: USA - Illinois