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� I know love and I know loss. I believe that everyone has a soul mate. Yes, there are others you will love but there is only (�I believe) one soul mate. Mine has come and gone. It hurts every day of every moment of my life. The worst days are days like this. The days that you feel it in everything you do. Everything you hear or see reminds you of them. Every breath you take makes you want to scream and your eyes hurt from the millions of tears you have shed. You can almost feel them there with you, holding you, smiling... you can almost feel their gentle touch. The worst thing is that you want to stay in this miserable moment all day just so you can be there with them once more. Then you realize that you must come back to your present reality, the one with your new love that is always there for you. You can't be in this state when they get home. The hard part is to pull yourself together and say good-bye to those cherished memories once again until that horrible day comes that�tortures you�all over again.

that boy called me up the night of my last post, and he ASKED ME OUT ON A DATE. and ever since, we've been hanging out at lunch and after his band and my chemistry. well, we're probably going over to his house on saturday and watching a movie! i keep thinking about kissing him and being with him and just everything about him. he put his arm around me for a really long time today, but it felt weird because i'm a tad taller than him =/. well, it seems as if he really does like me, and i'm not looking forward to gulf shores only because i wont see him AT ALL. :(. well, i'm hoping that the thursday night before i leave, i can hang out with him and maybe go on a date with him. i really want to spend the whole evening with him and have our first kiss. but you can't plan these things. they have to just happen. like mine and david's first kiss. i doubt he'll kiss me infront of his family. and i doubt we'll be left alone. not that his rents dont necessarily trust me, but just that we're only 15/16. but i really hope that she trusts me. even though i dont have any reason to be trusted. (but she doesn't know that). ;) haha. jk. well, i can't wait to just go on a date with him, i'm feeling so needy, like i just NEED to be with him. and i'm scared that i'm falling too hard too soon, because i know how much he can hurt me.

love always,
Jenna

Ok well my name is Caitlin and I'm in the 7th grade. I don't have a big sis but a big bro. whos not very helpful. *lol* In grades kindergarden thru 4th grade a guy I am completely in love with was at my school and in my grade, too. His name is Alex. I have always had the same feeling when ever i see Alex. Except its gotten a little bit stronger. I start to shake if i see him or i get really really quiet. I have a "friend", Angel, (who I hate) whos mom sits me. Alex and Angel are like best friends but in fifth grade Alex transford. Sometimes Alex comes over Angel's house but all I can do is look at the floor the WHOLE time because im afraid that i will lock eyes with him and he might think im weird. I don't know if he likes me but everytime i say just one little thing to him then i start to shake like crazy! I want him to know but im too shy and im worried about what he would think, if he likes me and his response. Please help me!

*The Kewlest Dork*

I havn't posted anything in a while.

Alot has changed.

1. I'm completly && totally in love.

2. I've known this guy for 4 years, so stfu about being to young to be in love. (i'll tell you more about him when i have more time to write.)

3. I'm still having the same weird feelings that i was having in my last posts.

4. I'm getting increasingly better at the piano.

5. I got a kick ass camera. <3

6. Writing has become a huge part of my life, i'll post some of my quotes/sayings/poems at the bottom of this entry...

7. There is way to much stuff on my mind to number it all.

001.

i wish i would've died in your arms the
last time we were together. so i wouldn't
have to wake without you today

002.

but the most important thing is,
even if we're apart,
i'll always be with you

003.

You know you’ve read a good book
when you turn the last page
and feel as if you’ve lost a friend

004.

You're in a car with a beautiful boy,
and he won't tell you that he loves you.
And you feel like you've done something terrible,
like robbed a liquor store, or swallowed pills,
or shoveled yourself a grave in the dirt,
and you're tired.
You're in a car with a beautiful boy,
and you're trying not to tell him that you love him,
and you're trying to choke down the feeling,
and you're trembling,
but he reaches over and he touches you,
like a prayer for which no words exist,
and you feel your heart taking root in your body,
like you've discovered something
you don't even have a name for

^^my favorite^^

005.

You have a choice. Live or die.
Every breath is a choice. Every minute
is a choice. Every time you don't throw
yourself down the stairs, that's a choice.
Every time you don't crash your car, you re-enlist

006.

Most days from the moment i wake to when i go to sleep at night....im unhappy. When i met you, all that changed

007.

And id rather be outside in the freezing rain with you
than to be warm in the arms of someone else.

008.

I�guess what i like best about you is how you
can make me laugh even when nothing's funny.

The closest thing i've ever felt to love was this.

It's the scariest feeling in the world. But at the same time, it's the best.

It's hard to say if it's love.

But, it's the best thing to it.

That's all! This summer had ended, but I can't say, that I'm upset about it. It was maby the best time in my life...but now...more meeting with friends, more work for me

My love...I don't understand anything about him and about me. I's very hard for me? but I can't sat, that I've dissapointed in him.I want to see him,hug and kiss, but...another question:what wants he.

I have had a problem with low self esteem for years now and sometimes I just lock myself up and avoid people for weeks. This all stemmed from a husband who beat me and the next who cheated, a large weight gain after quiting smoking,�along with a little teasing from the kids�in school and you are bound for disaster. Counseling did not help. I believe this is because they ask all kinds of questions about who I am. How can they help when I don't even know who I am? I have started something on my own to fix ME! Nobody knows me better than I don't know myself! LOL So, I am on a quest to find out who I am. I now set aside 15 minutes a day for me. It can not be about my children, work or boyfriend. This is about me. I get out paper and a pen and write down who I am. My list is not always the same but at least I will figure out who I am. Every day I evaluate the list from the day before and then write a new list for today. I am slowly learning the statements that truely define me and the ones that I was tricked into believing is me. You should do the same. Some examples from my list today was... I am a mother, I am a daughter, I am a granddaughter, I am a woman, I am a sister, I am an aunt, I could be a best friend to someone some day, I am a photographer, I am an animal lover, I am lazy, I am fat, I love my lips, I love my eyes, I hate my teeth, I hate my legs, I am controlling, I can be hateful, I am over eager to please, I want everyone to like me, I am selfish, etc... My list is very long and has some horrible things in it but that is who I am to ME and nobody knows me better than ME! It changes all the time and the things I don't like about me, can be changed by ME and only ME!

I think, over time, this will be very helpful to ME!